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Postby rustyslide » Mon May 07, 2007 12:56 pm

I'd love those lyrics again too, my long suffering father had to suffer through a few of those.
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Postby ricochet » Wed May 09, 2007 3:26 am

Here you go:

Colon Preppin' Blues
©2003 John Culp

I hear my colon rumblin',
It's gonna blow again.
An' I ain't seen no toilet paper
Since I don't know when.
I've been drinkin' Phospho-Soda,
Lord, it seems so long.
And my bowels keep on dribblin',
I'm stuck here on the throne.

(Solo)

When I was just a baby,
My mama told me, "Son,"
"Always eat your fruits and veggies,"
"Don't cook your meat well done."
Now my colon needs a scopin',
To find what's ailin' me.
Guess I've got to keep on hopin'
It will be trouble free.

(Solo)

If I was a colon doctor,
If this bowel prep was mine,
You bet I'd let folks wash it down
With a little bit of wine,
But I've got to keep on purgin',
Until it all runs clear.
I wish this all was over,
It's tearin' up my rear!
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Postby leftyguitarman » Wed May 09, 2007 3:39 am

Those lyrics are sick. haha
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Postby mickeypainless » Wed May 09, 2007 4:39 am

THAT is frikkin AWESOME John, thanx for the HUGE laugh!
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Postby ricochet » Wed May 09, 2007 2:19 pm

You're welcome!

Got my scales back. 225 this am. Told my wife I'd gone on a huge eating binge last night. She asked what I'd eaten, and I told her. She laughed. Said that'd just have been a start for me not long ago, and she's right.
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Postby bluejay » Wed May 09, 2007 3:11 pm

Thanks for the lyrics, Rico -- that sure encourages me to get in for my overdue exam. :shock: :P This high side of 50 sure has lots of new fun and games for us ol' guys...and gals, too. My wife turned 50 on Monday, but she says she can't feel much difference between that and 49 so far. As they say, give it time.
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Postby 601blues » Wed May 09, 2007 4:08 pm

HAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAgasp!!AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAgasp!!can't breath!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Postby dcblues » Wed May 09, 2007 4:23 pm

Colon Preppin' Blues


A good followup would be Screamin' Jay Hawkins' "Constipation Blues." it has to be herd to be appreciated.
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Postby ricochet » Wed May 09, 2007 5:38 pm

Try to do it with a straight face in your best Johnny Cash voice. Johnny would understand.
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Postby cas » Wed May 09, 2007 7:46 pm

The image of Johnny Cash singing this song was too much for me, nearly passed out from laughing.

Love it, Ric.

Carol
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Postby 601blues » Wed May 16, 2007 6:35 pm

:shock: My wife said I had my head up there so many times I shoulda checked them out my self!! gezz no respect!!
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Postby maxx england » Thu May 17, 2007 2:35 pm

Oh man, you know,
601 has the bues,
he got 'em,
Yes you know,
601 has the blues,
he sure got 'em,
Took a nosebleed to the VA,
And they searched for it up his bottom!

I've had a scope for my prostate: my advice? Take a pain killer or smoke something really good beforehand, it doesn't actually hurt, it's more like the biggest sting you ever had in your life. It certainly has your full attention.
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Postby 601blues » Thu May 17, 2007 2:44 pm

:D Thanx Maxx!!! does have a RING to it, Iam gonna finish it off! and record it!!
I weighed in at 226 this morning!!!!! how is everybody else doin???
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Postby bluesmcgoo » Thu May 17, 2007 3:09 pm

Well, I'm at 206 this morning. Down from 222 on April 16.

Congrats, by the way. Keep it going!
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Postby leftyguitarman » Thu May 17, 2007 6:07 pm

Maxx, after hearing about the prostate story, I am damn glad that I am only 17. :lol:
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